Archive for June, 2017

June 4, 2017

Hang in there

Over 15 years of depression and PTSS and since about a year, I am finally able to watch the news again without shutting down. I am finally recovered and I manage to go through life in a way that could be considered healthy. It is like stepping out of a bubble and to be frank: It is scary as hell. First I was scared about what it meant to be considered healthy, then I was scared to fall back, and then I slowly turned back on the news channels, daily newspaper, actually clicking the links to articles, reading about attacks, hatred, torture, pollution, the sadness, the demolishment, the exclusion.

Then there are these discussion going on in my head, about what the world needs to become a better place, about how to make people aware of the consequences of their actions. The discussion about what actually is good and bad and the acknowledgment that there is no human to make that decision, and so on… Discussions that I have had over and over again for way longer than those 15 years.

I can hardly think of solutions that do not include accepting that what I feel might be the right thing to do at this point, might turn out to be the absolutely wrong thing in the long run. However, I am convinced that it is better to try to take action instead of absorbing all these dark stories, dark headlines and dark feelings and just sit here at home on the couch crying, or lay awake at night, overthinking these troubles.

I always tried to keep supporting those in need, even when I was in my darkest days, no matter the species, nor their specifics. I know the lonely. I know the hate. I know the ready to give up. And I know it is worth to keep fighting. Because between all the scary headlines, I read all the messages of people who just cannot understand the horror. I see the love all these species can give and receive. I see the warmth and the hope hiding behind the despair and the fear.

So here I sit, after a major episode of crying over forgotten abducted school girls, bombings and attacks, demolished forests and (near) extinctions of their inhabitants and dying relatives of relatives (and so on). I sit here, writing this, and I wonder what it is I really want to say. Do I want to say “hang in there, it will get better”? Do I want to say “I know what you are going through, you are not alone”? Or do I want to say “You have the power to change some of it, no matter how small, your actions count”? Well, I guess, I want to say all of that.

So here I go: Hang in there, it will get better because you have the power to change some of it. No matter how small, your actions count. I know what you are going through, or at least I can relate to a part of it and you know what, you are not alone. There is no honor in complaining about how bad any situation is unless it is for the sake of you getting back on your feet, gathering your power to fight your personal demons, or the demons of the world. We cannot oversee the consequences of our actions over the long run, however, there is science that can help us to try to make good decisions and then there is respect and being open minded, so we won’t start to radicalize our ideas and think we are better than anyone else. Everyone makes mistakes. If that happens, well, complain a bit, get back on your feet and start trying to make this world a better place again.

Today, I want to celebrate diversity in all its forms. Tomorrow, I will continue my quest. Feel free to join me on this adventure.